Jokes,Cartoon and Wisdom Words

<正> JokeOn a visit to Chicago, a woman was eager to visita posh department store a few blocks from her hotel.Her husband agreeably hailed a cab."The lady wantsto go to Neiman Marcus," he told the driver.The cabby looked over his shoulder at them. "Andthe gentleman?" he asked. "Does he want to go tothe bank?"     

Jokes,Cartoon and Wisdom Words

##正## JokeA juggler, driving to his next performance, isstopped by the police."What are those knives doing in your car?" Askedthe policeman."1 use them in my juggling act," says the juggler."Oh yeah? Let's see you do it." Says the policemanSo the man starts tossing and juggling the knivesA guy driving by sees this and says, "Wow, amI glad I stopped drinking. Look at the test they'remaking you do now!"     

Jokes,Cartoon and Wisdom Words

<正> Joke"Didn't you suspect burglars had been in thehouse when you saw all the drawers pulled out andthe contents scattered all over the floor?" asked thepoliceman."No, I just thought my husband had been looking fora clean shirt," replied the woman.     

Jokes,Cartoon and Wisdom Words

<正> JokeA family went to a hospital, where one of theirrelatives would be having a brain transplant. One of therelatives asked,"What will the cost of a new brain be?"The doctor replied,"A female brain costs $25,000 anda male brain costs $50,000".The men smirked, but oneof the females asked, "Why is that, doctor?""Well," thedoctor replied, "the female brain is less because it hasbeen used."     

Jokes,Cartoon and Wisdom Words

<正> JokeA woman who had thrown a dinner party, at whichraw oysters, curried lamb, and steamed musselswere all served, met her physician on the street thefollowing day. "I'm sorry you weren't able to come tomy party last night," she said."You are so busy these     

Jokes,Cartoon and Wisdom Words

<正> JokeAt a BBQ, a couple was chatting with someguests when the marriage counseling topic cameup. The wife very pompous commented: "Oh,we'll never need that. My husband and I have anexcellent relationship. He was a communicationsmajor in college and I majored in theater arts. Hecommunicates real well and I just act like I amlistening."     

Jokes & Cartoon

<正> Two ducks were out on a lake, one wasfeeling happy and the other one was feelingupset. When the one duck asked the otherduck: "How was your anger therapy session?"The other duck replied:"He said I was in need     

小幽默

吃鱼肖童正在姑姑家吃午饭,姑姑为她做鱼。肖童边吃边说:"这鱼真好吃,要是不放刺就更好了。"     

小幽默

儿子：“你不是说你从来没在夜里叫我起床吗？” 妈妈：“是啊!” 儿子：“我是什么时候出生的？”     

Jokes

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Jokes

Even SmarterTwo women that are dog owners are arguing about whose dog is smarter...First Woman: "My dog is so smart, every morning he waits for the paper boy (送报工) to come around and then he takes the newspaper     

as改错专练

John was reading a book under a bigtree.Mike came up and said, “Be quick,theteacher is waiting for you.”     

Jokes

A woman phoned her daughter,who lived with a roommate.Instead of connecting with either of the young women,she got this recorded message: "Katy and I are not in at the moment.If you are a man,leave your name and number and we will promptly return your call.If you are a parent,everything is fine,and we will call you soon.If you are a bill collector, we have already paid the bill."译文:一个妇女给她的女儿打电话,她女儿有一位室友。然而,这位母亲没有和两个年青姑娘联系上,却听到了下面的留言:“我和凯蒂现在不在。如果是位     

小幽默

Two PronounsProfessor:Name two pronouns,please.Student:Who? me?Professor:Good! Sit down,please.两个代词教授:请列举两个代词。学生:谁,我?教授:很好,请坐。     

小幽默

英国和月亮老师:英国和月亮哪个更远?约翰:英国。老师:英国?为什么?约翰:因为我能看见月亮,却看不见英国。     

Jokes

A One day,a rich man and his son went out for a walk.On their way,the rich man felt very uncomfortable and found he had put on a pair ofodd shoes,one with a thick sole and the other with a thin sole.     

小幽默

母鸡的腿 儿子：爸爸,为什么母鸡的腿很短？父亲：提这么傻的问题!难道你不知道吗？如果母鸡的腿太长,下蛋的时候会把鸡蛋摔破的。     

初二易混词语讲与练（Units15—17）

一What kind of dog is always bitten but never barks?什么样的狗总是被咬却从不叫?