什么最宝贵?

“what 15山e rea一good?,,1 asked in musing①mood.0全der,said the law eourt;Knowledge,said the school;Truth,said the wise man;Pleasux·e,said the fool;Lov乌said the maiden;Beauty,said the Page;Freedom,said the drea〔ner;H帅e,sa记山e sage‘③:Fame。:,aid the suldier:乞q山ty,,tne seer/.Sna奴mv heart full sadlV: Ine 80SWer 15 not nere.Then within my bosom④、this 1 heard;aCh hesrt holds theSeCret:Kindness 15 the word.”“什么最宝贵?”我百思不得其解。:秩序;:知识;:真理;:享乐;:爱情;:美貌;说:自…     

Tea or Coffee?

Once a man took a drink from his cup and then said to the waiter,“Waiter,is this tea or coffee?”The waiter said,“Can't you tell the difference,sir,by the taste?”“No,”the man said,“I cant.”“Well,”answered the waiter.“If you can't tell the difference,what does it matter which it is?”Tea or Coffee?!河南@马志芳…     

Where is the father

Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings. “Look”,said the elder brother,“How nice these paintings arel” “yes”,said the younger,“But in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children.Where is the father？”     

CALL THE SHOTS

“I think we should have gotten that point,”said Wendy.“It wasnot fair for the referee to penalize our team.”“Well,”said Helen,“we may not think it is fair,but the referee isthe only one who can call the shots.If he said you were out of bounds,then we have to accept that decision.”Word explanation:     

掉进陷阱的老虎(英文)

1.O ne day,a tiger fell into a trap.H e cried,“H elp。H elp。”2.A m ouse saw him and said to anelephant,“Let’s help the poor(可怜的tiger.”The elephant said,“H e is going toeat you.”“B ut he needs our help,”saidthe m ouse.3.A snake cam e and said,“I can helhim .” The snake and the elephant helpethe tiger out.4. “Thankyou,m y friends,”said the tiger.“B ut I’m hotand hungrynow.” Suddenlythe tiger ate thesnake.The elephant and the m ouse w ere veryangry.They said,“Y ou’re a…     

Man’s First Sin

The　serpent　was　more　crafty　thanany　wild　creature　that　the　Lord　Godhad　made.He　said　to　the　woman,“Isit　true　that　God　has　forbidden　youto　eat　from　any　tree　in　the　garden?”The　woman　answered　the　serpent,“We　may　eat　the　fruit　of　any　tree　inthe　garden,except　for　the　tree　inthe　middle　of　the　garden;God　hasforbidden　us　either　to　eat　or　to　touchthe　fruit　of　that;if　we　do,we　shalldie.”The　serpent　said,“Of　courseyou　will　not　…     

The Surprise Cake

“I must go now,”said Mrs.Hall.“I’ll come back as soon as I can.”Betty said,“We will be all right,Mother.I’ll look after things.”“Yes,”said Mrs.Hall.“I knowyou will,and the other children canhelp you.See that the goats don’t getout of the barn(牛棚),Betty.A manis coming for them Saturday.”     

A Cheap Meal

1)A man went into a restaurant. He ordered all the most expensive dishes and ate them with great enjoyment.2)Then a small boy came into the restaurant and sat at the man's table.The waiter said to the man:“what would your little boy like,sir?”3)“Oh,just an ice cream.”the man said. Then he stood up and said to the waiter:“I'm just going out to buy a newspaper.”4)The boy had eaten ice cream,then he stood up and walked to the door.5)The waiter said:“Excuse me, but your father hasn't come…     

Please Accept The Money

One day,a man told the Father[神父],“Oh,dear Father．I have stolen ten thousand yuan!”“But it’s not right for you to do so,”said the Father.“Well,do you want it?”said the man．     

幽默二则(英文)

Lawyer and Engineer A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean.The lawyer said,“Im here because my house burned down,and the insurance company paid for everything.”“That's quite a coincidence,”said the engineer.“Im here because my houses     

Grinning All the Time

Mick was seen leaving the theatre at the interval(幕间休息)during anew play. “Excuse me,sir”,said the doorman,“Isn’t the play to your liking?”“It’s not that at all,”said Mick. “It’s just that the programme saysthat the second act takes place two weeks later,and my mother told me to be     

阅读理解

Nasreddin wanted to buy some new clothes,sohe went to a shop.First he asked for some trousersand put them on,but then he took them off andgave them back to the shopkeeper and said,“No,give me a coat instead of these.”The man gave him a coat,and said,“This onecosts the same as the trousers.” Nasreddin took thecoat and walked out of the shop with it. Theshopkeeper ran after him and said,“You have notpaid for that coat!”“But I gave you the trousers for the coat,”saidNasreddin.“They co…     

We Don't Need the Sun at Night

“Don't sleep in class,LiMing!”shouted the teacher.“You are wrong,sir.” LiMing stood up and said.“I'mthinking about questions now,I'm not sleeping.”“I'm sorry.” said theteacher.“Would you like toanswer my questions?”asked theteacher.“Certainly.” said L i Ming.“What is it?”“Why does the moonsometimes look like a plate(圆盘 ) and sometimes look like asickle (镰刀 ) ?” asked theteacher.“Oh,this question is easyto answer.” said L i Ming.“When it is full,it looks like aplate…     

In a Restaurant(在餐馆)

1.“Here's your vegetablesoup(汤汁 ) ,Madam.”“Thankyou.”　　 2 .“Waiter!Do you call itvegetable soup?Look at thegreen ball.It's a fly(苍蝇 ) !”cried the woman angrily.　　 3.“Really?the waiter putthe dark green ball into hismouth and said,”oh,no!It'sjust a piece of burnt(烧糊的 )green onion(洋葱 ) .”　　 4.“It's awful(恶心 ) !”said the waiter.“But yousaved(挽救 ) the restaurantfrom disgrace(不体面 ) !ThisC- note(1 0 0元 ) is for you.”said the boss(老板 ) .　　　 Mark Twain was …     

The Mouse and the Frog

1.One day a mouse met a frog on hisway.“Let me take you to a place to eatsomething delicious,”said the mouse.一天,老鼠在路上遇到青蛙。老鼠说:“我带你到一个地方去吃好东西。”2.They came into a rich man相似文献   

受表扬还是受批评?(英文)

A young woman carrying a three- year- old child got on a bus. The conductor hurriedto give her a warm welcome and then kindly asked the other passengers to make moreroom for the woman and her child. On seeing this, people began to talk.“You know this conductor used to be very rude. Now suddenly he has changed hisbad attitude ( 态度),”said a middle- aged man.“Yes, he should be praised and we must write a letter to the company,”said the secondpassenger.“That’s right,”another lady said,“…     

COME TO PASS

“I do not think I will ever pass the bar examination,”said Carolyn.“It is so hard and there is so much to know.”“Don't worry,”said her friend,Alex.“You are a good student andvery smart.You will be successful with the examination—it will come     

幽默三则(英文)

Dumb and Dumber On vacation in Hawaii,my step-mom,Sandy,called a cafe to makereservations for7pm.Checking her book,the cheery young hostess said,“I'm sorry,all we have is6:45.Would you like that?”“That's fine,”Sandy said.“Okay,”the woman confirmed.Then she added,“Just be advisedyou may have to wait15minutes for your table.”My Widowed GrandmotherWidowed for the second time,my grandmother told me she probablywould not remarry.“You're still young,”I said.“Why not?”“When I marr…     

I Am Using My Pencil

Over the doctors telephone came a call from a man who said that hilittle son had swallowed his pen. The doctor said, “I'll come at once.What are you doing in the meantime(在此期间)?”“I am using my pencil,”the man answered.I Am Using My Pencil!山东@石继忠     

公元2050年

Tomand Fred were talking about the year 2050 .“What will 1 be like inthe year 2050 ?”asked Tom.“I don t know,”said Fred.“What do youthink?”“Well ,no one knows . But it is 2 to guess ,”said Tom.“In the year 2050 everybody will 3 apocket(袖珍) comp