笑话(英文)

I Am Younger Than You Father:I can't stand that,do you know whyⅠ'Ⅱpunish you sternly? Son:I don't know. Father:Because you beat the younger child.Ⅰ'Ⅱnever let it happen again. Son:But I'm younger than you,you can't beat me any way!     

双语笑话(一)

心不在焉的老师有一天,人们看见一个有名的心不在焉的老师在路上走,他的一只脚一直踏在街沟里,另一只脚踩在人行道上。一个碰见他的学生说,晚安,老师。您怎么了?     

笑话

我说了算 老师：“优优,成绩单带回家让家长答字。” 优优：“让爸爸签还是让妈妈签呢？” 老师：“啰唆,你家谁说了算谁签。” 优优：“那我自己签吧,我家我说了算。”     

幽默与笑话(英文)

A tourist in Africa sent his mother an exotic bird for her birthday.When he got back to the States,he called her."Hi,Mom,"he said."How’d you like the bird I gave you?""It was delicious." "You ate the bird!"the guy shrieked."He was very expensive.He could talk!"     

幽默与笑话(英文)

A Two little boys were discussing their future."What are you going to be when you grow up?"asked one of them."A soldier,"answered the other."What if you get killed?""Who would want to kill me?""The enemy."The other boy thought this over and said finally:"OK,then,I’ll be the enemy."     

幽默与笑话(英文)

Different dates A Russian diplomat (外交官 ) and his American were having a date (约会) at a U.S. night club.     

笑话集锦

一一位中国学生对日本留学生说:"我昨天做了一个梦,非常精彩。"日本留学生忙问:"什么样的梦?说来听听。"中国学生:"梦里你是男主角哦!"日本留学生大喜:"真的?我是不是英俊潇洒的白马王子?"中国学生:"不!我梦到你手拿着菜刀,气喘吁吁的追着一只猪。"日本留学生纳闷:"我在追一只猪?"中国学生:"是啊!你跑得汗流浃背的,结果,那只猪跑到了一条死巷子里。"日本留学生疑惑:"然后呢?"中国学生:"你高兴地逼近它,那只猪突然跪地求饶,说道‘本是同根生,相煎何太急’。"     

笑话集锦HOW FUNNY(1)(英文)

(1)Bob: We'll have some visitors tomorrow.Jack: How do you know Bob: The headmaster has come to see us clean the classroom.     

心不在焉闹出的口误笑话

1小时候,爸爸看我写作文。有个很简单的字写错了,爸爸笑着跟我妈说:我发现你的儿子很笨。我急了,大声跟我爸说:你的儿子才笨!     

笑话(英文)

Family QuarrelThe young newly-weds(新婚夫妇)quarreled.At last she could bear (忍)it no longer and burst into tears(哭起来)."I don't want to have anything to do with you any more.I'm packimg up(收拾)my things and going off to mother.""Fine,my dear,"said the husband."Here are the travelling expenses(路费)"She counted the money and asked: "What about the money for the return ticket?"     

JOKES

First Question "I hear you have a boy in college.Is he going to become a doctor,an engineer,or a lawyer,perhaps?"     

JOKES

汤姆：彼得，你说过你只有一个弟弟，对吗？ 彼得：是的，没错。     

JOKES

首要问题"听说你有个孩子在上大学。他将来是当医生、工程师还是当律师?"这个还不知道,"对方慢条斯理地答道,"目前的首要问题是:他能不能升到二年级?"     

JOKES

I was travelling in a bus yesterday. Sitting opposite me （在我对面 ） was a lady with a small child, and the little boy was crying bitterly.     

JOKES

(A) A man was buying a Rolls-Royce(劳斯莱斯汽车)and wanted to Pay cash,but he found he was2 pence(便士)short of the 1500 needed.Outside the car showroomshe saw a man selling newspapers,and he went out and asked him: "Could you lend me 2 pence?I want to buy a Rolls-Rovce." "Sure,"replied the man."But look--here'S 4 pence.Buy one forme as well."