Two Foolish Men(初二适用)

Once there was a very foolish man.One day he put a bag of rice onthe back of his horse and went to town to sell it.The horse ran fast andhe could not catch up with it,so he got on the back of the horse.Soon thehorse began to go very slowly.     

那不是葡萄干

A kid walks into a lunchroom at school and sees a fly on the table. He swats it and leaves there. Another kid walks in, sees the dead fly and says, "Hey, cool, wings." So he pulls the wings and walks away. A third kid comes in, sees the dead fly, and says, "Hey look! Legs!" So he pulls the legs and leaves there. A fourth kid comes in and he also sees the dead fly. He leans over to look at it and pulls off its head. Then, the first kid comes back, sees it and says, "Hey, look, a raisin," and he eats it.     

SHORT MEMORIES

During the 1920s,Dad worked hard tosupport our family, but there was very littlemoney left over. One day,I noticed the sole was almost off one of his shoes and he was putting a cardboard in its place so he could go to work. After he went to bed that night, I quickly took his shoes and went out to the     

The House of 1000 Mirrors

Long ago in a small, faraway villas;e, there was a place known as the House of 1000 Mirrors. A small, happy little dog learned of this place and decided to visit. When he arrived, he bounced happily up the stairs to the doorway of the house. He looked through the doorway with his ears lifted high and his tail wagging as fast as it could.     

HUMOUR AND JOKES

A Once upon a time, there was a man who wanted to steal a neighbour's doorbell. But he clearly understood that while his hand touched the bell, it would ring and something terrible would happen to him. The ringing could be heard by others. So he covered his ears with something, thinking that everything would be all right and that he could get the doorbell without any trouble. But what happened was that he was caught on the spot for stealing the doorbell of his neighbour.     

五粒豌豆的故事

The shell burst,and the five peas rolled out into the bright sunshine.There they lay in a child's hand.The little boy said they were fine peas for his pea-shooter.And immediately he put one in and shot it out."Now I am flying out into the wide world," said the pea, "Catch me if you can," and he was gone in a moment."I," said the second, "want to fly straight to the sun." And went away."We will go to sleep wherever we find ourselves," said the two next, "We shall still be rolling onwards," They felt on the floor,and roll about before they go into the pea-shooter;but they were put in it. "We shall go farther than the others," said they."What is to happen will happen," said the last,as he was shot out of the pea-shooter;and as he spoke he flew up against an old board under a window of an old house,and fell into a little crevice.The moss closed round him,and there he lay.     

无处不幽默

Waiter and Customer A customer ordered a cup of coffee in a restaurant.He found a fly in the coffee,so he called the waiter. Customer:How do I drink this coffee! Waiter:Don't you know how to drink coffee? Customer:Waiter,see,there is a fly in my coffee. Waiter:Oh,yes sir.You are right! There is a fly in your coffee.     

The Ass and His Purchaser

A MAN wished to purchase an Ass,and agreed with its owner that he should try out the animal before he bought him.He took the Ass home and put him in the straw-yard with his other Asses,upon which the new animal left all the others and at once joined the one that was most idle and the greatest eater of them all.Seeing this,the man put a halter on him and led him back to his owner.On being asked how,in so short a time,he could have made a trial of him,he answered,“I do not need a trial;I kno…     

Country Life

I looked around me.I had been up here several times in June and July and Icould remember the sunshine,the smell of the warm grass,and the scent of flowersand pines that came up the hill from the valley below.But it was hard to relate thesmiling landscape of last summer with this desolation.The flat moorland on the fell top was a white immensity rolling away to the hori-zon with the sky pressing down like a dark blanket.I could see the farm down there     

七月翻译擂台翻译稿及点评

We crossed the river and arrived at the station, where I bought tickets while he busied himself seeing to my luggage. There being quite a bit of luggage, we have to pay the porters some money, only after that could we pass. Then he was also busy haggling with the porters over the price. How smarty I was in those days that I frowned upon the way father was bargaining. I was about to cut in a few words when he finally finished wrangling and agreed on the price.     

Phone Dinner

One day, when I was at an airport waiting for my flight, I had to make a phone call. I looked around and found all the phones were busy. So I went to wait in line and stood there for a long time.The person talking on the phone was an old man and I could hear the conversation clearly. He was talking about his trip in this city. He said he was having a good time. He commented on(评论) the weather here and asked about the weather back there. While he was talking, he was eating a sandwich and drinking coffee.     

THE CLEVER WIFE

Once there was a famous builder by the name of Gobborn Seer, and he had a son called Jack.One day Gobborn sent Jack out to sell a sheepskin, saying, "You must bring me back the skin and the value of it as, well."Jack went, but he could not find any one who would leave him     

完形填空齐齐看

(A) Yesterday evening,when I went to town 1my mother,we met a strange old man. It was raining 2and we had no umbrella.We were trying to3a taxi when he came up to us.He was carrying a nice umbrella and he said that he would give 4for only a pound.He had forgotten his wallet.He said he needed taxi to go back home.My mother didn't believe what he had said at first,and5 him a lot of questions.But she finally believed the man and gave him the pound.She was happy to6 a good umbrella for so little.However,the old man didn't get into a taxi.We walked7 him and found he went into a pub and bought himself a glass of 8with the pound.After he drank it,he 9~his hat and took up one of the many wet umbrellas there and went off with the new one.     

Flying with Wings

There was once a little boy who wasraised in an orphanage.The little boy had always wished thathe could fly like a bird. It was verydifficult for him to understand why he couldnot fly. There were birds at the zoo thatwere much bigger than he, and they could fly.     

To Help a Blind Man

Last Monday was a sunny day. I got up early in order to get to schoo l early, because it was the first day of a week. On my way to school, I saw a ma n standing beside the street with a walking stick in his hand. He was wondering there and moved slowly. It seemed that he wanted to cross the street. At that ti me, a car passed by and nearly hit him. I ran to him only to find out that he wa s a blind man. It was not easy for a blind man to cross the street. I decided to lead him to the othe…     

所得税官员(英文)

Recently, I was visited by a man who said he was an "assessor", a word which I did not then understand very well. I said I had never heard of his line before, but I was pleased to see him. I asked him to sit down, and he did.I could think of nothing particular to say. So I asked him if he was opening his shop in the neighbourhood.     

穿越世纪的DIY——十字绣

I have been cross-sitiching on and off since the late 1970's when I was in middle school. What drew me to learn this handcraft was the simplicity of the art yet the intricate designs that one could create. Learning to corss-stitch is very simple since the basic stitch is making "x's" with colored thread on a piece of fabric. I enjoy the ability to easily take my craft with me on trips for something to do when there is a rest period.The first pieces that I corss-stitched were small single character designs that I was able to make into bookmarks or put into very small frames for on top of a desk. The finished fronts on these pieces turned out looking really good, but the backs looked like an explosion of threads. As I cross-stitched more, I began to learn and understand how to stitch my "x's" so that the backs of my cross-stitched pieces looked almost as neat as the fronts.Now people look at the backs of my pieces and admire how neatly my color changes(start and end of threads).     

FUNNY STORIES

A One morning Wood left his house with six donkeys (驴) for the market.After a time,he got tired and got on to one of them.He counted the donkeys,and there were only five,so he got off and looked for the sixth.However,he did not find it,so he went back to the donkeys and counted them again.This time there were six,so he got on to one of them again and went on forward.     

Why he Couldn't Leave

There was a meeting with a large number of people.At first the speaker was very interesting,but as time went on,he became very boring.Finally when he was through,there was only one man sitting in the large room. The speaker walked up to the man and said,"Thank you for hearing me out when all the others left the room.""Oh! Don’t mention it!"replied the man,"I cannot leave because I am the next speaker."     

皮卡普之作(英文)

Paul," my boss Richard began as he sat on my desk. I always knew there was something up when he sat on my desk, because it meant he was taking me into his confidence. Helen, on the sixth floor, is going back to directly working with clients. We need someone to manage the team of case workers up there. Are you interested?I looked into space for a few seconds. I knew why he wanted me to manage the case workers. Most of them