幽默与笑话(英文)

1.A Forgetful ManA man who was tired out went to bed as soon as he reached home.Suddenly it occurred to him that he had intended to do something thatevening.But as he could not remember what it was,he tossed and turnedin his bed for a long time.Finally th…     

幽默与笑话(英文)

Buying the TicketsThe woman in a theatre box-office was surprised one evening just be-fore the show at the behaviour of a boy.He bought a ticket,went away,and then returned a few minutes later to buy another one,he went awayagain,returned and bought a third ticket.Then he went away yet again,returned yet again and bought a fourth ticket.By this time the show hadstarted,so the woman in the box-office said,“I hope you donHt mind myasking,boy,but why do you keep coming back and buying more tic…     

笑话与幽默(英文)

The Shape of the EarthTeacher.Green!or.What about yours?Kevs:1.B 2.A 3.C0:How does Li Lei likeWhere are you from,Mr EI am from Sydney.Do you like working hereYes,I like it very much.Where is Mr Brown now7.Hi,Chen Hong!Hi.Sun Wei!Do you WOt:No,I WOrk in a …     

幽默与笑话(英文)

A Two little boys were discussing their future."What are you going to be when you grow up?"asked one of them."A soldier,"answered the other."What if you get killed?""Who would want to kill me?""The enemy."The other boy thought this over and said finally:"OK,then,I’ll be the enemy."     

笑话与幽默(英文)

Ali, who was working a long way fromhome, wanted to send a letter to his wife, buthe could neither read nor write and he had towork all day, so he could only look for some-body to write his letter late at night. At last hefound the house of a letter-writer whose namewas Nasreddin.     

幽默与笑话(英文)

Another languageMrs Mouse was taking her babies for awalk one day when they met a large cat.“Bow-won!” (学狗叫声) shouted Mrs Mouse andthe cat turned and ran away.“You see, children, ”said Mrs Mouse, “How important it is tospeak another language!”It     

幽默与笑话(英文)

“What do you want on Mother's day,Mum?”three naughdy kids(淘气的孩子)asked their mother before Mother's Day.     

幽默与笑话(英文)

1. Still in the Same Cemetery A man asked an acquaintance how his wife was; then, suddenly re- membering that she had been dead, she blurted out, “Does she still live in the same cemetery?” 2. The Juice in the Downpour It had been a long, hot summer, and a Vermonter was mighty glad when the rain came. One day while it was raining, he was out on the pa- tio having breakfast. “It felt so good, ”he told a friend.“I just went ahead and ate in the downpour. The only trouble was that it too…     

幽默与笑话(英文)

Self-teaching On an airplane trip,I sat next to a woman and her six-year-old grandson. When I said that I was a teacher,she started to ask him to count the numbers backward. He said quickly:\"Twenty,nineteen,eighteen,seventeen...\"\"That was wonderful,\" I s…     

幽默与笑话(英文)

Different dates A Russian diplomat (外交官 ) and his American were having a date (约会) at a U.S. night club.     

幽默与笑话(英文)

正ATeacher:(Looking through查看Lee's homework)I wonder how one person could make so many mistakes?Lee:It wasn't one person,teacher.Father helped me.BTeacher:A noun is the name of a thing.Who can give mea noun?First boy:A pig.Teachter:Very good.Give another noun.Second boy:Another pig.     

幽默与笑话(英文)

A tourist in Africa sent his mother an exotic bird for her birthday.When he got back to the States,he called her."Hi,Mom,"he said."How’d you like the bird I gave you?""It was delicious." "You ate the bird!"the guy shrieked."He was very expensive.He could talk!"     

幽默与笑话(英文)

Male or femaleA woman visited the zoo and asked akeeper whether the zebra(斑马)was male ora female.“Madam,”replied the keeper,“that is aquestion that should be of interest to anotherzebra.”SleeplessnessMary went to see a doctor and said,“Doctor,I can!t sleep.”The doctor asked,“Did you try counting?”“Yes,I counted to487465.”answered Mary.Then the doctorasked,“Surely you fell asleep?”“No,then it was morning.”Marywas disappointed(失望)and answered.Ten secondsTom!s grandma care…     

幽默笑话(英文)

Nasreddin put two big baskets of grapes on his donkey and went to market.At midday it was very hot,so he stopped in the shade of abig tree.     

幽默笑话(英文)

When Mr Jones went to restaurant one day,he left his coat near the door.There was nothing in the pockets of the coat when he left it, so he was very surprised when he     

幽默笑话(英文)

There was a big garden near Nasreddin's house,and it had a lot of fruit trees in it.Oneday Nasreddin saw some beautiful apples on one of them.He went home and got a lad-der,put it against the high wall of the garden and climbed up.Then he pulled the ladder up,put itdown on the other side,     

幽默与笑话(校园笑话)

了不起的人主考人:“告诉我,如果莎士比亚今天还活着,你认为他是否会成为一个很了不起的人物芽”考生:“是的。他肯定会成为一个极了不起的人物,因为无论怎样,世界上还找不到一个能活400多岁的人。”(李平)赶快吐出来老师在黑板上写了一个化学分子式,然后问学生:“约翰,你来说,     

笑话(英文)

Very few people were com ing to eatatthe White Rose Restaurant,and itsow nerdid notknow whatto do.Thefood in hisrestaurantw ascheap and good butnobody seemed to wantto eatthere.Then he did som ething thatchanged allthat,and in a few weeks his restau-rantw asalw aysfullofmen with theirlady friends.Wheneveragentlem an cam einw ith a lady,a smiling waiter gave each of them a beautifulm enu.The