For Another Excuse

Jim doesn＇t like school and is always looking for excuses （借口l ） not to go. If he coughs, he asks his mother to write a note saying he has a cold. If he has a headache, he asks his mother to take him to the doctor during school hours. He spends more time at home than he does at school. Even when he is at school, he looks for excuses to go home early.     

In Tune or Not(高一适用)

My aunt Aggie used to think that she was able to sing very well.But I am sorry to say her singing was terrible.One day she asked a piano-tuner to come and tune(调音)her piano.He came,and when he tried to tune the piano it seemed to be all right.However,he thought he had better do something though he would rather have gone away.so he went over it carefully and made a very good job of it.A few days     

Keeping Busy...

Anewly married sailor was informed by theNavy that he was going to be stationed along way from home on a remote island inthe Pacific for a year.A few weeks After he gotthere he began to miss his new wife,so he wroteher a letter.“My love,”he wrote,“we are going to he apartfor a very long time.Already I'm starting to missyou and there's really not much to do here in the     

Chicago Safe?

A man was telling his co-worker(同事)one day that the company wastranaferring him to Chicago.He explained that he was going to quit(辞职)before he had to move there. When asked why,he replied that he was just too afraid of all the crimeand did not desire to risk being robbed just to get to work.     

A Football Fan

Tom is a football fan. Every morning he goes to work by train. As he has a long way trip, he always buys a newspaper. It helps to make the time pass more quickly. One Wednesday morning, he turned to the sports page. He wanted to read the report about an important football match the night before. The     

You May Need Them Later

A man is going to the house of a friend. It is quite far away and so he takes some sandwiches(三明治) along for his lunch. As he goes along,he says to himself,"My friend is sure to give me a very nice meal.He is going to give me good wine (葡萄酒) to drink.So what's the use of these dry sandwiches?"As he says this,he throws them on     

幽默与笑话(英文)

1.A Forgetful ManA man who was tired out went to bed as soon as he reached home.Suddenly it occurred to him that he had intended to do something thatevening.But as he could not remember what it was,he tossed and turnedin his bed for a long time.Finally th…     

重要启事

Jack was an able worker. He could do 1 the work in the factory and often helped his boss （老板） Mr. King. Mr. King liked him and he got much money. But he enjoyed drinking and he spent most of his money 2 the drinks. When he drank much, he 3 control （控制） himself. His boss had told him to stop 4, but he didn＇t listen to her. The woman had to leave him. Now he lived in a small and old house alone.     

时文选读

ed. forum 1 : Why won't my son go to school? Q. At 8:30 every morning my nine-year-old son says: I don't want to go to school today. There is no obvious reason. I think he would just prefer to stay at home and do as he please. I tell him that he has to go to school, he argues, and we both end up annoyed (2). How can I handle it better?     

How to improve the ability of listening and speaking

When you are giving the knowledge to the students,don't forget to teach them all the abilities of learning this language.Then how to improve the students' listening skill? We know the largest difference between mother lan- guage learning and foreign language learning is the envi- ronment.A child can soon learn his mother language well. He has heard a lot before he can say something and walk. Then after he is able to walk and say,he has a chance of listening to more.Before he goes to school,he has al- ready been a good listener and speaker.     

The Rescue

Joe Langton worked at the Thorby paint factory,but he did not likehis job as an electrician.His main interest in life was playing and wat-ching football.On several occasions he had gone to watch a matchinstead ofgoing to work~2.He used to tell the manager that he hadbeen ill.The manager suspected that Joe was lying,as it was usuallya Saturday when Joe was ill.He threatened to dismiss him if he everdiscovered that he had been absent without a good reason.     

They Ane Not Repained yet

A man went out of prison after twentyyears.He decided to go back to the neighbout-hood where he had lived.When he got there hecouldn’t recognize(认出)the place.Everythinghad changed a lot.The places he used to visit     

Ice Fishing

Don decides that he will go ice fishing. So he goes to the library and reads and researches ice fishing. Then he goes to the sporting goods store     

A Filling

Mike has been in poor health since he was born.Hismother has to take him to the hospital whe he doesn'tfeel well.And every time,the doctor gives him some medi-cines though he hates them very much.It's diffcult forthe woman to persuade(说服)the boy to take them.Shehas to give him some sweets as soon as he swallows(吞)some medicines.Now the boy dosen't have anything if heisn't given any sweets.     

Jim＇s Stomach-ache

Jim went to the doctor‘s this morning. He likesapples very much and yesterday he ate too manygreen ones, so this morning he had a stomach-ache(胃疼), When he came to breakfast he was crying.     

Half a Pie,Quite Enough

A man was so hungry that he was ready to eat seven pies.But he felt quite full after he had eaten six and a half.He regretted this so much that he started to beat himself,     

幽默七则

The last day of a criminal condemned to death came. The police asked him what he would like to have for breakfast. He was told he could have anything he liked.     

A Cheap Radio

趣味完形填空 Mr Turner found work last month. Heherds(放)sheep for a __. It's a piece of hardwork and he has to spend the whole days on thehills or by the river. But Mr Hunt __ himmuch. So he likes his new work. But the __was that he was sometimes caught in the __and his clothes were wet when he got home. Sohe wanted a radio __ he could listen to theweather forecast (天气预报). Once his wifewent to town, he told her to buy one for him.The woman tried to __ some money andbought a cheap radio. She said that a cheap onewould do the work as well.     

A Quick E-mail（高一适用）

Mr Lynch left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick E-mail. Unable to find the piece of paper on which he had written her E-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory.     

A Busy Mouse

This mouse has a busy week. On Monday, he goes to the living- room. He watches TV there. On Tuesday he goes to the bathroom. He has a wash there. On Wednesday afternoon, he goes to the bedroom, He has a good sleep