当计算机失灵

The most frightening words in the English language are,"Our computer is down."You hear it more and more when you are on business.The other day I was at the airport waiting for a ticket to Washington and the girl in the ticket office said,"I’m sorry,I can’t sell you a ticket.Our computer is down.""If your computer is down,just write me out a ticket.""I can’t write you out a ticket.The computer is the only one allowed to     

Mr Smith and the Doctor

Mr Smith was ill and he went to see a doctor. The doctor asked him toput out his tongue(舌头),and then he said,“OK.You can put your tongueback now. There’s nothing wrong with you,but I'm afraid you have aproblem:you seldom take exercise.”。“But,doctor.”Mr Smith said,“I don’t think so.”“Don’t tell me what you think,“the doctor said.“I know what yon need.     

FUNNY STORIES

Johnson was a young soldier in a big camp(军营).During the week the soldiers always worked very hard.But it was Saturday,and all the young soldiers were free,so their officer said to them,"You can go to town this afternoon,but first I’m going to inspect(检查)you."Johnson came to the officer,and the officer said to him,"Your haiJohnson ran to the barber’s shop,but it was closed because it was Saturday.Johnson was very sad for a few minutes,but then he smiled and went back to the officer."Are my shoes clean now,sir?"he asked.The officer didn’t look at Johnson’s hair.He looked at the soldier’s shoes and said,"Yes,they’re much better now.You can go out.And next week,first clean your shoes,and then come to me."     

The Elephant Did It!

A man was travelling abroad in a small red car. One day he left the car and went shopping. When he came back, its roof was badly damaged. Some boys told him that an elephant had damaged it. The man did not believe them, but they took him to a cirus which was near there. The owner of the elephant said, “I am very sorry! My elephant has a big, round, red chair. He thought that your car was his chair, and he sat on it!” Then he gave the man a letter, in which he said that he was sorry and that he would pay for all the damage.     

一罐金子(英文)

Once a farmer was put in prison. Even though(即使)this farmer was in prison,he wasn't a bad man. He hadn't done anything wrong. At this time the king's men were collecting money. The king needed money so that he could fight wars and the people had to pay a lot of taxes(税). Now this farmer didn't have any money. He told this to the king's men. When they came to his house,he said,"I can't give you any money. I am such a poor man that I've hardly got enough to live."The king’s m en laughed. …     

伊索寓言(英文)

The FishermanA Fisherman went to a river to fish, and, having laid his nets across the stream, he used a stone and a long cord to beat the water in order to drive the fish into the nets.A cottager who lived close by came and complained that the Fisherman was disturbing the stream and making the water too muddy to drink."I am sorry that this bothers you, " replied the Fisherman, "but it is by troubling the waters that I gain my living. "     

Something Left

1One night,Tom wasaboutto go to bed when he heard the doorbellrang He opened the doorand saw Mike stood there Tom was frightened because he owed([藜u]欠)M ike a lotofm oney,and he didn’twantto return m oney to M ike郾2郾M ike went into the flat and said angrily,“ I have looked for you for a long tim e郾Now you have lived in such a big and beautiful flat郾W hy haven’t you returned the m oney to m e so far?”3郾“ I will return the m oney to you tom orrow郾Don’t be angry,” said Tom 郾 …     

阅读理解一则

One of the qualities that most people admire in others is the willingness to admit one's mistakes. It is extremely hard sometimes, to say a simple thing like “I was wrong about that”, and it is even harder to say, “I was wrong, and you are right about that. ”     

高中英语新课标选修八 Unit 5 Meeting your ancestors读写训练步步高

一、完形填空I’ll never forget the Christmas when I played Santa’s helper.Our son Alvin,who was six years old,1 a new sound system. "Please bring me a new stereo(立体声) so I don’t have to listen to my dad’s old 2," he told the mall Santa.Laura and I took note. On Christmas Eve,we placed Santa’s cookies and milk 3 the fire,tossed a few carrots on the roof for the reindeer,and 4 Alvin to sleep in our bed at the back of the house,5 the sound of Santa’s boots wouldn’t wake him.I had 6 a small workshop in the spare bedroom and spent the whole night putting together that stereo. 7,I took a break to move Alvin from our bed to his-he was afraid that Santa might think he wasn’t home and would forget     

阅读理解二则(英文)

(A) One day, Mr Black went into a restaurant. He put his coat on achair near the door. There was nothing in the pockets of his coat. Afterhis meal he put on the coat, then he found there was much money in oneof his pockets. He immediately realized that someone else had taken hiscoat away by mistake. “Whose coat is this?”he thought. He saw a waiternear the door, so Mr Black said to him, “Somebody put a lot of money inmy coat. I have no time to wait for him. I have to go. Return it to him,please.”The waiter took the money and went away. A moment later, an-other man came with a coat just like Mr BlackKs. “IKm sorry, ” said theman. “I took your coat and you got mine. Please give me my coat and the     

The Best-laid Plans of Mice and Men

One of Robbie Burns' most famous poems is Ode to a Mouse. He wrote this after he accidentally destroyed a mouse's nest while he was working in the field. The poem contained the phrase "The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men". In the poem Burns apologises to the mouse! But he also explains that sadly, no matter how carefully you plan things, they can still go wrong.The phrase, "The best-laid plans of mice and men" is now a common phrase.     

没人让我讲话

One of the qualities that most people admire in others is the willingness to admil one‘s mistakes. It is extremely hard sometimes to say a simple thing like“I was wrong about that” ,and it is even harder to say, “I was wrong, and you were right about that. ”Perhaps the reason we admire this.     

微笑(英文)

Smile at each other, smile at your wife, smile at your husband, smile at your children, smile at each other-it doesn't matter who it is-and that will help you to grow up in greater love for each other. Mother TeresaMany Americans are familiar with The Little Prince, a wonderful book by Antoine de Saint-Exupery. This is a whimsical and fabulous book and works as a children's story as well as a thought-provoking adult fable. Far fewer are aware of Saint-Exupery's other writings, novels and short stories.Saint-Exupery was a fighter pilot who fought against the Nazis and was killed in action. Before World War Ⅱ, he fought in the Spanish Civil War against the fascists. He wrote a fascinating story based on that experience entitled The Smile( Le Sourire. )It is this story which I'd like to share with you now. It isn't clear whether or not he meant this to be autobiographical or fiction. I choose to believe it is the former.He said that he was captured by the enemy and thrown into a jail cell. He was sure that from the contemptuous looks and rough treatment he received from his jailers he would be executed the next day. From here, I'll tell the story as I remember it in my own words.     

完形填空练与析(英文)

Erik was a fourteen-year-old boy.Hethought he was a young man but his par-ents didn’t think so.They told him,“Whenyou begin to think about1others,you’ll be a young man.”One morning,Erik’s parents gave him2money to buy some hamburgers.He saw an old man there.The man lookedsick.Erik went up to him and found thatthe old man had lost his3andhadn’t had4for hisbreakfast.Erik took the oldman to the nearest restaurant.5the man ordered only aglass of water for himself.Erikfelt sorry for him,so he askedthe waiter to6...     

20只猫与一个猫碗(英文)

A man was looking for things of the old times. One day he came to a village and found a blue bowl. It looked veryold. The bowl was on the ground and a cat was drinking milk from it. A farmer, the owner of the cat , was lying besidethe bowl. The man did not want the farmer to know that he was interested in bowl. So he said to him softly, “What anice cat you have? Will you sell it to me?”“How much will you give me for the cat?”the farmer opened his eyes and asked.“Twenty dollars. Would t…     

Jokes

1.Father and son Father:You know,Mike,when Lincoln was your age,he was a very good pupil.In fact,he was the best pupil in his class.Mike:Yes,Father.I know that.But when he was your age,he was President of the United States.2.How do you find it?Teacher:Mike,you copied from John’s paper in today’s exam,didn’t you?     

To See the Doctor

Sam comes to see the doctor. Doctor:What’s wrong with you? Sam:I have pain in my left foot. The doctor examines Sam’s foot.But the foot is OK. Doctor:I’m sorry.But I don’t know why you have pain     

“Sorry” First

There is one word that is on the lips of Americans, day and night: “Sorry“.One time as I was walking on the street, a young man ran by hurriedly, brushing against my handbag. Even as he continued on his way, he turned back and said “sorry“ to me. Even in a rush, he didn‘t forget to apologize.     

教你正确用(五)

When Order IS and Isn’t an Order Order的多咱含义The other day I went to see my doctor for a physical check-up.He said to me, "Our first order of business today is to get you a full blood test. "What the doctor said interested me.Of course it was not the blood test he was ordering for me that interested me;what interested me was the word "order".     

海外来鸿(英文)

Hi,dad.Howare you today?Today is the first day of our holiday.Ifelt good.I had a busy morning,fromhalf past nine am to one o’clock pm.Idid all the things that mom assigned meto do,and then I started to read somebooks that I borrowed from the library.I was interested in the story,and Icouldn’t stop,for I want to knowtheending.The view out of the window was verybeautiful.Everywhere is white,coveredwith snow.The snowstorm that beganfrom last night,didn’t seem to stop,and the trees that had lost all of theirlea...