尴尬的(英文)

A woman was singing.One of the gueststurned to a man by his side and criticized(批评)the singer."What a terrible voice!"he said."Do youknow who she is ?""Yes."was the answer,"she is my wife.""Oh,I beg your pardon,"the man said."Of course her voice isn't bad.but the songis very bad.I wondered(想知道)who wrotethat awful(糟糕的)song?""I did,"was the answer.     

Modern Inconveniences

"When I was a youngster," complained the frustrated father, shaking his head, "I wasdisciplined by being sent to my room without supper, But our son has his own color TV,phone, computer and CD player." "So what do you do when your son misbehaves?" asked his friend. "I send him to our room."     

What a Clever Man

Li Fei drove a taxi through the busy street of Hangzhou every day .One day a young man jumped into his taxi."To the station,hurry up!" he shouted.Li Fei drove veryfast,but at every corner there was a red light.The young mansaid, "Be quick!I don't want to miss my train." Li Fei shouted,too, "I don't want to die (死) here!" He turned and noticed (注意) the young man's face. "Oh,he's the thief (贼) and killed a woman," hethought. "His picture was in the newspaper." Li Fei had an idea.     

Jokes,Cartoon and Wisdom Words

##正## JokeA juggler, driving to his next performance, isstopped by the police."What are those knives doing in your car?" Askedthe policeman."1 use them in my juggling act," says the juggler."Oh yeah? Let's see you do it." Says the policemanSo the man starts tossing and juggling the knivesA guy driving by sees this and says, "Wow, amI glad I stopped drinking. Look at the test they'remaking you do now!"     

Fun Time

Drunk In the afternoon,a father and his little son are going home.At this age,the boy is very interested in all kinds of things and is always asking questions.Now,he asks,"What's the meaning of the word ‘drunk’,dad? Well,my son,"his father replies (回答),"look,there stand two policemen.If I regar (把 ……看作) the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But,dad," the boy says,"there's only one policeman!"     

外公,愿您一切安好

My eyes are filled with tears that threaten to 1)spill over as I look at grandpa's blank,2)pale blue eyes.My sister is just finished reading a book written by Richard Paul Evans注1,and my mom turns to face her father who doesn't even remember reading the same book the day before."You were that dad for me," she 3)whispers."Really?" he replies,smiling with his 4)childlike 5)oblivion.My mom nods,crying,and I 6)clench my hands until my fingers turn white from loss of blood flow.     

爷爷的一封信

<正>One day,a young man was cleaning out his late grandfather’s belongings when he came across a bright red envelope.Written on the front were the words,"To my grandson."Recognizing his grandfather’s handwriting,the boy opened the envelope.A letter inside read     

2001年中考完形填空解析（徐州市）

It was too late at night when an old man came to a small town. He found an inn ( 小旅馆 ) and wanted to stay there for the night. After he 1 his room, the owner said to his wife, "Look at his bag. There 2 much money in it. Let' s 3 when he' s asleep, _4_ ?""No, no," said the woman. "He must look 5 his bag tomorrow morning. If he can' t find it, he' ll telephone the police."     

The Young Rooster

A young Rooster(公鸡)was summoned(被叫到)to his Father’s bedside (床边)."Son,my time has come to an end,"said the aged bird."Now it is your turn to crow up the morning sun each day." The young Rooster watched sadly his Father’s life slipped away (逝去). Early the next morning,the young Rooster flew up to the roof of the barn(棚子). He stood there,facing the east. "I have never done this before,"said the Rooster. "     

沙漠的印记

"The sea was much better,"the traveler complained."Whenever I got tired it at least had its currents to push me forward on my journey but you,"he looked at the vast desert surrounding him."You are of no help."